I woke up this morning with a kamikaze fly dive bombing my head. It was enough to scare the living daylights out of me. What is with flies and my apartment? They seemed to come out of nowhere. My roommates and I have cleaned the house from top to bottom with no avail. I don't know why they seem to come back or why they like my apartment so much. I mean, I like it- but that doesn't give the flies a right to like it too. I've gotten really good at snapping towels at them, kind of like a men's locker room (only I've never been in one - so kind of like the men's locker room in a movie...) I killed 5 of them yesterday with a flick of my wrist.When my wrist started hurting, Denae and I went to Target to find some traps that would get them to carry poison to their lair and kill them all off... But I guess Target doesn't believe in the mass murder of annoying flies because all I could find was some ant killer and a red fly swatter. Since the problem wasn't with ants, I chose the Red Fly Swatter of Doom. When I got home later that night, I let Rachel, my roommate, and Tyler, her boyfriend, have the first go at it in the kitchen. They only killed one. (I think they were doing more than just attempting to kill flies... gross).
After watching a strange movie with Rachel and Tyler, I went up to my room, fly
swatter in hand. That seemed to keep them away. I think it was the bright red color. (Or they may have been frightened at the sight of me haphazardly waving the fly swatter around like Harry Potter when he learns how to use his wand for the first time.) I fell asleep with The Red Fly Swatter of Doom in my hand. It must have fallen out in the middle of the night - because that is when they started dive bombing my head. I hid as best as I could under the covers, but I really don't like my head covered when I am sleeping. When I thought it was safe, I peered out -- the coast was clear... or so I thought. Moments later there was another attack. I guess he was still upset that I took out his comrades-in-wings earlier that day. The battle to sleep was lost. When the sun finally popped out from behind the mountains and poured light into my room, I found the fly swatter and proceeded to carry it with me the rest of the morning. That seemed to keep them away. The ones that couldn't resist following me got what they had coming to them. But there seems to be one that has out smarted me. He keeps landing on me to let me know that he hasn't forgotten about me. I find it very annoying. He lands on my laptop as if to mock me "Naner Naner - you can't catch me..." Is it wrong, but I just want him dead??
